Candice vs. Gluten

The rivalry begins...

I decided to continue my commitment with not eating gluten, two weeks and counting. I know how much people love reading about my Kripalu digestive endeavors just as much as my spiritual ones so here is a weekly recap of my fight. I feel like I’m losing the battle 5 rounds to 3 though. In one corner we have Candice, wearing the red scarf and yoga pants. She is unprepared for this fight but is putting on a tough face anyway. Her corner looks nervous about the match-up. In the other corner we have Gluten, wearing the “flour” flower trunks, confident, strong and undefeated thus far. Gluten knows he outweighs Candice and senses her fear.

The wondrous challenge of no gluten came upon my awareness as a test of will and discipline for the goal of improved health and increased prana, a/k/a life force energy. Patanjali’s Yoga Sutra II. 40-41 is translated into the following: “If you stay clean then you will never find yourself in crowds of the filthy. Truth, purity, sweet thoughts, single-pointedness and mastery of one’s senses are all qualities that make you suitable for seeing your true self” I seek increased self-exploration and birds-eye vision of myself and my vices. I also have been primed to be extremely sensitive to the needs of my body, thoughts and emotions. I’ve recently recognized symptoms, seemingly unrelated, that could be linked to the intake of gluten, i.e. joint pain, inflammation, drastic drops of energy and headaches. I have embarked on this exploration of restraint as an informal experiment hoping to both uncover the depth of my commitment and discover the truth about my digestion. It’s not as easy as I thought it was going to be. Can I last 12 rounds?

Round one: I went to my favorite, awesome “too-good-for-words” pizza place in this cute town Great Barrington and I ate the gluten-free crust for the first time. It was good but very thick and no match for it’s crispy, burnt in all the right places, thinner crust relative. It’s like a distant love that lingers, I am reminded of the past when that delectable thin gluten touched my lips…bummer!

Round two: Lunch at Kripalu often consists of toasted rice paper tortillas with butter alongside my usual kale, of course. The tortilla is like hot glue when it’s dry…shiny, plastic and rough…me no like.

Round three: I got a fever this week and was sent down hard to my bed by my body because of the detox it’s going through. I missed all fun and active things Saturday and slept 15 hours instead. Please allow me to complain here: what is this doing for me anyway? Is it worth missing yoga dance with live drumming? I want out and I want out now! Candice catches a right hook on the chin and is knocked down. She is dazed and confused.

Round four: I went to the MASS MOCA museum and decided to eat a nice lunch out for a change. I really had to wrestle my mind away from the avocado melt and instead went for a salad knowing I’d be safe from danger and temptation. In a moment of panic, I realized the salad came with fresh French bread. I quickly sabotaged said gluten by submerging it in a watery substance on the table as well as quickly covering it with a napkin just in case I fell weak. Very close call, but Candice is showing some signs of life in the fourth.

Round five: I had to pass by the tasty, decadent, gluten-loaded sweets at Guido’s, an all organic supermarket. Who came up with that name?? I did however, stop and stare at the cream surprise cake, mint cupcake and chocolate muffins, reading the ingredients carefully hoping there was something I could eat; no luck there. Oh the suffering!

Round six: I decide to purchase dinner off-site in lieu of a rainy day one stormy evening as I was driving back to “the Krip.” For many minutes I shuffled my feet around the supermarket frustrated, attention-seeking and sulking at the lack of options but left with the following: blue corn tortilla chips, garlic hummus, cauliflower and raw cashews. This was my dinner, very sad indeed… although dipping the cashews into the hummus wasn’t as bad of an idea as originally thought. More uplifting news on this day was I drove past a beautiful arrangement of sculpture angels. I stopped and gave thanks for them and thought this could only mean good news for me, my gluten challenges and world peace. I had the feeling that all of the above would be supported by them.

Round seven: The middle of the night I walk into the kitchen to get a cup of water and there it was: a plastic tub filled to the rim with vanilla cake left over from dinner with a sign on it reading “eat me.” My knees caved and I opened the lid and sniffed. That was all it took, I broke off a quarter of a slice and hate it slowly with my eyes closed. Gluten is winning folks, gluten is winning. Will Candice be able to recover from this?

Round eight: I managed to make it another whole day without Gluten, even after the recent relapse. It looks like this fight is going the distance. I went blueberry picking with my roommate and we had a blast. I not only was able to practice yoga poses amongst the blueberry bushes, but I was also able to eat said blueberries. No gluten in sight, joy! Only time will tell how this battle ends. At least for today, I am hanging in there and hoping for a knock-out in later rounds.

More information to be relayed as news breaks. My goal is to make it until the end of my stay here gluten-free. Speaking of which….I can’t believe I’m winding down this amazing journey already, two weeks and counting. I’m engrossed in what is left for the taking while secretly manifesting what I want to create back home. I like that I cannot yet give a summarized explanation of the profound impact of this experience in my life because I’ve decided, as of this moment, that I’m still in it. I’m thinking Swami Kripalu would approve of my mindfulness. I still have things to get out of here and I’m still taking all kinds of risks to improve my sense of self. At some point, I’ll be able to recap, but not today. Today is the story of gluten.

"This is the time. This is the place. This is the vastness. Right here is paradise. Always, always." --Byron Katie

Jai Jai,

p.s. big things coming up in future blogs including but not limited to: a summarizing of my experience, intentions for coming home, reports of my kale intake, details about the last program scheduled for this week on becoming a certified energy healer with angels, a conclusion to the gluten match and news on a super-exciting opportunity to teach the guests at Kripalu in one-time workshop I call "Salsa and a Spicy Life."